peelosophy

I have been asked this question over and over again – probably about once a day.

I understand why people ask it, I probably would too.  I guess it’s a logical question since we will have 4 kids come December and live in a 2-bedroom house.  Just with the repetition of he question- all I hear is “What is wrong with you?”

The fact of the matter is, we are fine where we are right now.  We are not crawling up the walls or begging for privacy.  We are very happy.  So if that makes us weird – so be it.  I’ve found that it definitely makes us outside of the norm, which is something I’m fine with, but in this situation, I find myself questioning our feelings.

This questioning has led me to late googling; the specific search, “big family small house”.  Wow.  That search was very comforting.  I found myself from feeling “little old woman who  lived in the shoe-ish” to feeling that our 900 square feet was spacious and sharing rooms was normal.  Try it.

The other thing I did, in search for peace with our decision, was rented the first season of Little House on Prairie.  My goal was to figure out how Ma did it?  Family of five living in a cabin surely smaller than our house.  Where did she put all the toys?  What about clutter? How did she organize the closets effectively?  Honestly, it took me about 3 episodes into it to realize that it was a movie set and watching the rest of the season was not going to answer my questions.  I know I was/am crazy.

After crazy searching and some heart searching, I feel confident that it’s not only not our plan to not move, it’s God’s plan.  I know when God is showing us a different direction to take our lives.  I can feel it, hear it, He usually won’t let up until we are on that path.  At least that’s how it’s been in the past.  So not now. I might be writing a very different post in 8 months.  But not now.

So let me take a second and share with you some amazing things that happen to you when you live big family, little house-style….

• You have to deal with each other.  I know that doesn’t sound amazing, but it really is.  In a big family little house – there’s no where to hide.  If you are having a rotten day, chances are everyone knows.  If you are mad at another family member, both parties know as well as everyone else in the house. And then you need to find a way to make it better, because it’s a little house and it’s hard to stay mad forever because you are constantly around everyone all the time.  (my kids don’t know the silent treatment yet – please don’t teach them) Don’t get me wrong doors slam and yelling happens.  But, conflict resolution, no matter how creative, has to happen in a little house.  Forgiveness has to happen too.

• Sweet little voices and conversations are always within earshot. There are some days I wish their voices were farther away, but for the most part I think there is nothing sweeter to hear them playing together.  The things I over hear are hilarious.  I get to hear them problem solving without my interference.

• Every bit of our space gets used. We don’t have an extra living room that is saved for company.  In every square inch of our home lots of living happens every day.  Sometimes transformations happen in different spaces.  For instance our breakfast counter, since March, has been transformed into a Lego counter b/c it’s the only place JJ can create without too little hands getting into little pieces.

• My kids know exactly what Mom and Dad do. This is an important aspect for me, it can also be scary too.  The boys know that laundry, dishes and whatever else don’t take care of themselves.  They are slowly understanding in order to play we need to get the work aside first.  The scary part is they see everything.  They see my attitude when I am emptying the dishwasher AGAIN or picking up the shoes everywhere time after time.  They see when John and I fight.  Yikes.  So all of this “seeing”,  I  try to be extra conscience and check my attitude about my work and try to fight fair and make sure they see a resolution.  Wow – that’s alot.

• Less to clean. Even if the house is covered with toys and projects, it takes 20 minutes to clean it from top to bottom.  And with a little help, it takes less time. This is a beautiful thing.

• Need not, want not. We don’t need to furnish anything.  Home Goods isn’t such a temptation for me because we don’t have the horizontal space for anything else.  If we find something we love, it usually replace something we have and love less.  Something in – something out.  Now we do have an attic worth of stuff that we have forgotten about since our move 4 years ago.  it was all saved for “when we have room for it”.  We’ve been slowly conquering it.

• More togetherness. I feel like since our proximity is so intimate, we do more stuff together.  For example, yesterday, while I was getting dinner together I was able to play a game of Memory with JJ because he was right there.