peelosophy

My friend Greta is doing a giveaway from her awesome ETSY Shop…check it out.   You have until this Wednesday the 26th….

Click here for more information!

My mind has been creeping around into places I don’t like to go.  Self-doubt seeps in.  I am making comparisons with others that don’t look like me.  Everything equals discontentment.

I recognized these feelings after a couple of days when they didn’t go away.  I am restless.  I found myself on Realtor.com, searching for something that would fill the void, something that would be the perfection that I was looking for – somewhere that I could rest.  Yesterday evening online, these places tended to be places with Master Bathrooms in desiring zip codes.

Last night, I had some sense to call a friend to talk to truth to me. I knew God was not telling us to move, it was my state of mind,  I love our home but I was too foggy to speak this truth to myself. I called Maddie, she told me just what I needed to hear and gave the assurance I needed to close Realtor.com.  THANK YOU Maddie!  Okay, I did leave one house up there for the remainder of the evening, but deleted the tab this morning, after realizing our backyard is way better.

Spring come quick!

“You have made us for Yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in You.” St. Augustine

I’ve been dealing with a sinus infection since last Monday. I’ve been getting them a couple times a year since I was pregnant with Henry. So “sinus stuff” is all a bit new to me. I was wise this time around and went to the doctor early before it got worse. Usually, I would tough it out until it got so bad I was rendered incompetent.
Now, I’m on antibiotics and am hopefully on the road to recovery. I still sound like I have been smoking 2 packs a day for the last 33 years.
I am not very good at is canceling life when I get sick, when my kids get sick I can, but not for me. Especially, when I get these sinus infections which aren’t contagious, I just want to get on with life, but I generally feel miserable.
I guess I just hate missing out when I am sick, it seems like such a dumb reason to me to not do something. There have been several big things that I have had to miss because of strep throat, which I am still bitter about.  The first, was the 8th grade end of the year field trip to Six Flags, I had strep throat and had to stay home.  The second was Mike and Catherine Schawackers wedding a couple years ago.  John was a groomsmen and apparently it was one of the best weddings of the year.  When I stayed home from that, I felt like I was in 8th grade again, except I didn’t have my mom to bring me milkshakes or cable to watch TV all day.

Pop Pop Pop! – katherinemariephotography: I don’t remember how I came across this blog, but before you click it, if you are having serious feelings of inadequacy as a mother, save it for a later date.  Seriously, these themes of the week that she does with her kids are gorgeous and totally off the hook as far as I’m concerned – that’s a compliment from afar.   She is clearly an amazing designer and photographer and I have become addicted to the beauty she is creating, but have allowed myself to only take a peek when I can  admire without feeling bitter.

Back to the Basics: Batch Cooking – SimpleMom: I have been waiting for something like this post to get me exited about batch cooking again.  I used to do it here and there a couple years ago, but lost my rhythm.  I thought this post was great to jog my memory and to encourage ideas that I haven’t tried before.

Before/After Chad’s Filing Cabinet Planter – Design Sponge: I don’t have time.  I have so many unfinished projects.  But I want to do this – I know exactly where it would go and what I would plant.  Oh well.

Dirty Little Secrets: The Riverside Church Blog: I  love this post that Kim wrote.  I loved reading the comments that people wrote about it.  I have read this book too. There are so many ideas from this book that really resonated with me, but I could never put it into words and this book does a great job.  I’ve always wondered where parenting righteousness comes from and why is it so hard for moms/women to be honest with each other;  this book addressed alot of this for me.

I’m kinda floored right now with the coincidental showering of thoughtful gifts I’ve received in the last 24 hours.  Of which half the people don’t know that we have been under a financial strain or that I have been desperately wanting things because of it.

It started last night at a wedding shower where the gifts to those attending the shower were earrings.  Can I tell you – I literally asked God for some new earrings like two days ago.  No joke.  I was putting on one of the two pairs that I own (because I have this thing about losing one earring) and I found myself really wanting to go out and buy some more earrings.  Instead of shopping, I told God that I would love some new earrings.  Yeah, it happened like that and now I have these…

Next was today, Greta called and asked what I was doing about 5pm, I told her nothing and knew John was working late.  She said, great, Maddie and her were taking me out to dinner at CJ Muggs their treat and that her mom was watching ALL 7 OF OUR CHILDREN.  The best surprise gift ever.  And Gail, their mom, wore the boys out so good they fell asleep in 10 minutes after hitting the sheets – record time.

Then, this evening, Lucy, the best neighbor ever, came over because she had a couple of things for me.  The first was a darling maternity shirt from Target that a friend of hers didn’t like after buying and it was too small for Lucy, but Lucy thought it would fit me – love it.  There is nothing like new maternity clothes for your fourth pregnancy.

The second thing she gave me was something I had been looking for for a while – a banana slicer.  Don’t mock, it’s really for the kids, they love prepping their own food for snack.  I haven’t been able to find one not online and mentioned it to Lucy eons ago and sure enough she found one and picked it up for me.  I am so excited about it!!

My friend Rebecca hosted an Art and Wine party a couple of weeks ago.  I was a little apprehensive at first, I’ve never done decoupage and friends together.   But it ended up being great fun.

My decoupage experience is very limited.  I’ve decoupaged one other thing previous to the party, it was a car bucket for the boys room to keep the million cars we’ve accumulated with 3 boys.  I decoupaged it with the DK Publishing book “The Big Book of Things that Go” which had almost all of the pages torn out anyways.  It turned out great and went with the car theme we had going in their room.

Here’s a picture:

The night of the Art + Wine party, we could choose from a tray, vase or bangle bracelets – I chose a tray.  It was definitely a process of trial and error for us all.  I learned about what not to do from my own mistakes.  The biggest one was paint the tray BEFORE you decoupage the center. The other was I wouldn’t have used the quote if I knew the paper would wrinkle up like it did.

My tray didn’t turn out perfect, I could maybe get a nickle for it at a yard sale, but I love it.  There is something about making something for yourself.  It wasn’t for anybody but me.  The upholstery I do mainly goes into to other people’s  houses so I don’t get to see it everyday.  I love seeing the tray everyday.

Here’s a picture of the tray:

I saw this decoupage idea after I did my tray.  If only I had some of grandma’s purses still around….

I’m blogging about my mornings this week because I want to be intentional and accountable about how I spend my time without kids.  To see how I came to be with out kids and how I desire to spend my time click here.

This morning I had time after I dropped the kids off to go home. I started my coffee maker and decided to “piddle” around the house until my lunch date at 11am.
Dictionary.com’s definition of “piddle” is this:
1. to spend time in a wasteful, trifling, or ineffective way; dawdle (often fol. by around): He wasted the day piddling around.
2. Informal. (esp. of children and pets) to urinate.
3. to waste (time, money, etc.); fail to utilize (usually fol. by away).

My friend Missy uses this term and I love it.  Although I think our meaning differs from the dictionary’s definition.  My definition is to “leisurely get things done around the house”.  There is no agenda for what I get done, if I get distracted – no big deal and it’s done  at an enjoyable pace.

Well, I piddled for only about a minute and  sat down on the couch to read a devotion and dozed on an off for an hour.  I was somewhere between not fully asleep and not wanting to move because I was so comfortable.  It was great.

I got up in time to meet one of my best friends from high school, Lvav, at lunch at St.Louis Bread Company.  We only get together once every 3 months or so and the time is always too short but sweet.  I got the new Chopped Cobb Salad and an Iced Tea.  I wouldn’t get it again, it wasn’t a traditional Cobb salad, there was no egg or avocado – the best part.

Am I sad my week of free mornings is gone?  Not so much.  I’m ready to get back into our routine.  Like I said yesterday, I am very challenged at getting everyone out the door at 8am.  It makes me cranky.  God help us when the boys are all grade schoolers.

I’m blogging about my mornings this week because I want to be intentional and accountable about how I spend my time without kids.  To see how I came to be with out kids and how I desire to spend my time click here.

This morning I did do more running around than in days previous.  My mother-in-law, Peggy, had a procedure done this morning and needed a ride.  I was glad that it landed on a week that I wasn’t babysitting so I could help out.

After I dropped off Peggy, I kidnapped my friend Jen who just had a baby 3 weeks ago and headed off for coffee at Starbucks in Old Orchard.  I had a tall vanilla latte (my standard) and a buttery croissant.  We had a really sweet time.  It made me vaguely remember what the first couple weeks with a newborn is like – I’m not ready for that yet.

I picked Peggy up from her procedure and went to Strattons Cafe in Old Orchard for brunch.  It’s seldom that Peggy and I get to hang out with out kids and by ourselves, so it was nice to spend some time with her.  I had the French Toast, which I wouldn’t get again, it was so much and I needed something else to counteract all the bread.  I did get the Island Oasis smoothie which I will get again – it was delicious.

So I guess today’s theme was food and good adult conversation.  Does it get any better than that???

I’m blogging about my mornings this week because I want to be intentional and accountable about how I spend my time without kids.  To see how I came to be with out kids and how I desire to spend my time click here.

This morning I had no idea what I was going to do.  Nothing was planned.  I figured I’d head over to Kaldi’s in Kirkwood with a few books I was reading and go from there.  I ended up popping into Madison Avenue Salon to see if they had any openings for a pedicure. They did and could get me in right away AND they were offering a special, buy a pedicure and get a manicure for FREE.  What the heck? Only if I had “time”, they said.  And I did have time, so I did.

I ended up having a great conversation with the nail tech, Catherine.  She is a mother of five, ranging from 22 to 9 years old.  She was very encouraging and just real about being a mom. I really enjoyed our time together.

At the salon, I also started to read a book Kim lent me called, “I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids“.  I LOVE it so far.  I’ll probably blog about it in another post.

Afterwards, I headed up to Kaldis to grab a quick lunch before I got the boys.  I tried something new – the Turkey Artichoke Sandwich and the Berry Tea.  I was not disappointed, really delicious, but a bit messy – glad I was alone.

Kara is the little girl I have babysat twice a week for over four years.  I have cycled several kids in and out of babysitting, but Kara (and her brother Jacob) have been the ones that have gelled the best with our family.  The dynamics just work for us on Mondays and Wednesdays.  I do love the time I get to spend with her, the house gets an extra shot of estrogen twice a week – it’s great.

My friend Dana, Kara’s mom, sent me this email a couple of days ago and I thought it was the sweetest thing ever.  Here’s what it said:

I had to email you before I forgot this.  Yesterday when Jacob was napping,
I heard the sweetest thing come out of my daughter’s mouth.  She was
playing hard core with her barbies, and all of a sudden went into prayer.
It went something like this.  “Dear God.  I really want you to give Ms Jill
a baby girl.  She really really needs one.  Thanks.”

Adorable.  She might just know what’s best for me or maybe she thinks that they’ll be Barbies at my house if I have a girl.  If Kara can promise that the baby girl will come out with her sweet personality and excitement about everything under the sun – I’ll take her.

F.Y.I. I won’t know till July….